A worthwhile modernization

 

"So hold up...even though it was translated before 1830, it was written in King James English?"

"Joe, you have to understand, these people fly to pieces like glass as soon as anything comes that is contrary to their traditions."

"But later on, they put up with harems?  Brigham Young has a bigger body count than even you do!"

"Joe, this new Book of Mormon, they're calling it the Covenant of Christ.  I'm telling you it's the most amazing thing ever.  Even stupid people like Kamala can understand it. But it hits right back at crooked Brigham.  It says 'I will have covenant people, says the Lord of Hosts, and we all know Lord of Hosts means he's a great general, a real Robert E. Lee type, and they will hearken to this commandment to only have one wife.' "

Sorry, guys

I think this is on me.  Evidently the heavens did not want to see any of our perineums, and took drastic measures to prevent it...

But seriously...Am I the only one who feels unusually disappointed?  And also feeling weird for feeling disappointed?  Is it about feeling like I've missed out on something important, hoping for a break in the clouds at the last minute?  What was I hoping for?  

Maybe someone will come up with an amazing inspiring photo from western New York and find the literal silver lining.

I'm not a woman, but it almost has a miscarriage-like feel to it, a sense of loss where you know there are still other opportunities, and you don't know why it hurts so much.  

I feel like there's some meaning in it, but I also feel dumb for thinking there's some meaning to it.  Both at a macro level for whatever this movement is, but also at a micro personal level, as my home is also in today's zone of totality, and it is pretty close to where the eclipse conference took place. I thought about heading home from the conference early to watch the eclipse to beat the traffic, but didn't.

My house had clear skies and a perfect view of the entire eclipse.  Cue the Curb Your Enthusiasm music.

Why is this such a big deal to me? It doesn't make sense.

For those at today's conference, am I the only one?

Announcement: Eclipse Perineum Sunning Workshop

 To be led by Perineum Expert Dr. McKay Platt and Astro-Philosopher Bryan Lang:

I'm sure we're all wondering how to best harness the power of the upcoming solar eclipse to energize our spirits and bodies.  In this Monday Morning eclipse conference workshop we will discuss something that was part of the original religion of the Fathers, perineum sunning during a total solar eclipse.

The Book of Yasher-halal-hash-baz noted that Enoch himself was born during a total solar eclipse, as though the fiery portal itself opened up to enter this world in the same way he exited it.

Note: since a certain someone has only about 3 pictures of himself on the internet (mugshot included), chatGPT has not been trained on his face, and we will therefore be denied the opportunity to have an AI-generated photo of him absorbing these sacred rays on his fourth eye.

I Do Declare

 

https://denversnuffer.com/2022/09/september-23-25-conference/

Zion and the jab

I was reading the “build a house” parable today.  The group who wanted to haul the stone to the place had the much harder path than those who found the clay on site and made bricks.  

"Those who had compassion said, The master's house is finished. What need is there for further labor to carry stone for the house? Let us not waste the effort of our fellow servants who have labored hardest, and we will put the stones to good use."

The stone builders were in the wrong, but those who had compassion (and the master) found value in the labor of the stoners.

In the end the Master said that 

"all of you have labored to do as I have commanded, and proven your faithfulness."

--even though there was “a season of quarreling and disputing”

"I ask again, What have you learned? What ought you to have learned?

…But I say again, there was honor in the labor of others. Whereas I look upon the heart and see faithful service, many among you do not look at, nor see, nor value what I the Lord love in the hearts of my people. As I have said before, I say again, Love one another, labor willingly alongside each other….All who have been faithful are mine." (emphasis mine)

There are specific and general implications in this parable.  Perhaps one thing that we ought to have learned is that it seems that the master is very generous in accepting the genuine labor of the servants, even if it happens to be wrongheaded.  Perhaps the Lord isn't looking for a people who are right about everything all the time.

So let’s talk politics and covid and all that.  Those who believe that the vax is more bad than good probably have an obligation to warn their neighbor about it.  And those who believe the vax is more good than bad probably have an obligation to warn their neighbor about it. One group is more or less correct. Time will perhaps tell.

"Friendships have been and are being undermined because of conflicting opinions about this virus. A great deal of the basis for the current opinions are based upon rumors, suspicions, fears and outright lies. Both ill-informed social media and respected leaders have used this as a wedge issue to divide us. Why are we letting that happen? It is our choice to respond with fear and anger."

There is honor in both people’s labor, even if they see the world differently from you. If we cease to be able to labor willingly alongside each other, we may be in danger of not being considered faithful.

Baghdad & Babylon

 Five years ago Dave posted on his blog:

"The God of Heaven tells me all the world should pray that Baghdad does not fall." 

It seemed to me at the time that the issue at hand for Baghdad at the time was ISIS, who occupied territory near Baghdad. I said my prayers for Baghdad at the time, and while I can't definitively take credit for the downfall of ISIS, ISIS definitely seems to have been defeated.  Indeed, ISIS peaked in late 2014 and was already beginning to decline by the time Denver made this post in February 2015, with Iraqi forces retaking Tikrit (87 miles NW of Baghdad) on March 12, 2015.

But May 28, 2015 Dave followed up with another post, just after ISIS took control of Ramadi on May 17, 68 miles to the west of Baghdad:

"Days of distress are upon Baghdad and the days of their troubles are begun. Distress shall overtake them, for those who come shall have no pity."

This seems to indicate that Baghdad would fall, and that our prayers did not abate the Lord's ire.  However, ISIS has seemed to be the nation to fall, and Baghdad remains in the hands of the Iraqis. 

But the title of the Denver's February post is Babylon, not Baghdad.  And while Baghdad falls within the borders old Babylonian empire, I'm wondering if Baghdad actually means Babylon, as in 

"The God of Heaven tells me all the world should pray that Babylon does not fall." 

But then why would we pray that Babylon does not fall, when Babylon are the bad guys?  Shouldn't we be praying that Babylon does fall? Perhaps it depends on what replaces Babylon, and what happens between the fall of Babylon and the Lord's return in glory.  Much like what replaced Saddam Hussein in Baghdad wasn't necessarily an improvement over Saddam (even though he was a monster), the chaos that follows the fall of Babylon and its economic and political institutions might be even worse than Babylon if Zion is not ready for the fall of Babylon.  

If we take our parallels from the Book of Mormon, are the Gadianton robbers Babylon, or are they what comes after Babylon?  Or if the Gadiantons are Babylon, then what follows is the low point of 3 Nephi before the coming of the Lord--the fall of the government, the people dividing into tribes, and eventually, destruction.  The  Book of Mormon makes no specific mention of Babylon by name on the Large Plates of Nephi (only on the small plates).  

So if Baghdad means Babylon in Dave's first post, does the followup post fit Babylon rather than Baghdad?

"Days of distress are upon Babylon and the days of their troubles are begun. Distress shall overtake them, for those who come shall have no pity."

In 2019 I would have said no, but this year...well, all of Babylon's institutions seem to be crumbling.  I don't know who will win the 2020 US election, but I will predict with confidence that whoever loses this election will not see the outcome as legitimate.  

Interesting symbolism in the hosanna shout

We've had 5 proclamations now. Like them or not, the 1st 3 all had new information, and were not received with a hosanna shout.  The Living Christ proclamation received no hosanna shout.

The symbolism of 3 old men alone in a room shouting hosanna has some impressive symbolism. Will the last person to leave the church please turn out the lights?

via GIPHY

Given that the leaves were green in upstate NY, this was taped no later than September 2019.  This is the big thing they’ve been building up to even before the last conference. They're all out of ideas. They give us regurgitated slop and expect us to shout with joy.

There is actually some nice symbolism in Joseph opening the dispensation in a grove of barren trees

But the word hosanna--God save us-- is fitting: We can still look to God and not these jokers.

Joseph Smith said that “no unhallowed hand can stop the work from progressing” While I wouldn't claim that God sent a global pandemic just to own the morms,  It seems like corona has stopped the church's work from progressing.

Me seeing Nelson in the sacred grove:

via GIPHY

The Remnant is Lit

#LightTheRemnant

What does a society of prophets look like?

hey guys...I'm getting kinda nervous here...




Given that failure is definitely an option for us...

Are we deferring too much to Dave and in so being darkened in our minds?  A comment from Denver holds a lot of weight in deciding relatively inconsequential matters:

Some thoughts shared with me from a conversation Denver had with one of the committee members indicated that the chronological order of that particular talk (OUR DIVINE PARENTS) is not critical.

While I believe Dave has stood before the divine council, part of me wonders if we should not be ascribing special weight to his opinions in places where he is not claiming any revelation.

I don't say this to call out others for their deficiencies, I see this in myself.   We need a society of prophets, where no one says "Know ye the Lord?" but I am not a prophet.  And the reason why we all  defer to Denver is that we don't trust anyone else to be a prophet for us.

I think the solution isn't for me to be able to trust your revelations, or for you to trust my revelations.

Therefore, let every man stand or fall by himself, and not for another, or not trusting another. (RE Mark 5:17, LE JST Mark 9:44)

It is for us to each get our own revelations.  For every man to stand or fall by himself, and to allow his neighbor to stand or fall by himself. To have the law written on our hearts. (Romans 2:15).  For me to trust you to get revelations for you, and for you to trust me to get revelations for me.

A Common starling.  Not much to look at. 

But what would our society look like if we were all our own prophets?  We've never seen such a society, and the scriptures are scant on the issue.

It seems likely that we would be in each others' business a bit less, trusting that each can hear God's advice.  And for those who can't hear God's voice, that would be job one for that person.

But sometimes a covenant body needs to coordinate to accomplish something, like write a statement of principles or build a temple.

Murmuration of Starlings.  Beautiful. 

How on earth do we coordinate to build a temple?  If the temple is our bodies housing the Spirit of God, then the answer is well-known.  But if it's a physical building that a corporeal Jesus will visit, then there will need to be coordination among a body of believers.  But I suspect the command to build a temple will not come until the covenant body has the law written on each member's heart, where each of us (or enough of us) is led by the Spirit.  If a command to build a temple comes and we do not have the law written on our hearts, then it will end like Nauvoo.  If our hearts aren't right, none of this matters.  If our hearts were right, we could coordinate like starlings, with no one in charge but the Lord.  I think Dave is really tired of being the head guy in this movement.

Matters of governance such as which of Dave's quotes to include in our scriptures are only practice in learning to get along at this point.   Keep in mind that if the movement succeeds, we get Jesus and an unsealed Book of Mormon.  A hundred years from now, our yak leather bound set of remnant scriptures will either be replaced with white stones, or it will be kept in an Lamanite museum next to Brigham's walking cane and the conference center podium made from GBH's tree as a reminder of the hubris of failed dispensations.

None of this matters if we aren't individual prophets.  It just doesn't matter if we include words denoting that a loving Mother was behind the word of wisdom.

It just doesn't matter if we get the scripture project exactly perfect.

It just doesn't matter if we got the best Guide & Standard or not.

It just doesn't matter if Dave is a truer prophet than Russ.

It only matters that we each become the kind of people who can live in peace, because those are the people that the angels can gather to Zion.

Many of us (myself included) have forgotten why we got on this spiritual path in the first place.  It was because we each discovered that the keeper of the gate is the Holy One of Israel, and he employeth no servant there.  That we should follow no man.

But now we are in real danger of being The Church Of Denver, "but receiv[ing] not the gospel, neither the testimony of Jesus, neither the prophets, neither the everlasting covenant.”  Against Denver's wishes, ironically.

If we fail, let's at least fail differently from the LDS from which we came.

Musical Extravaganza Oct 6

The Servant David's 66th Birthday Celebration

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October 6, 2019
Location:  Chuck-A-Rama in Murray, UT

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A gala celebrating the 66th birthday of The Servant David will be held Sunday, Oct 6, 2019, at 8:00 p.m. mountain daylight time at the Chuck-A-Rama in Murray and will be broadcast live in nine languages on youtube.

Performing artists CuvBruvz, one of Gladys Knight's former Pips, the group of people who say "Welcome to the Denver Snuffer Podcast", and Wayne Osmond will join the Mormon Tabernacle Choir (It's just a bunch of Adrian Larsen's family--but why not since the name is no longer taken).

The birthday celebration will share insights into the life, ministry, and service of The Servant Formerly Known as Denver. A puppet show will focus on how his career, family, and ministry have shaped who he is as a special witness of Jesus Christ. 

Log will jump out of a birthday cake and sing "Happy Birthday Mr. Servant Dave."

While the obsequiousity is free, and the fun and feelings will be complimentary, dinner will cost $15.99 for adults, $13.59 for seniors over 60, and children at the rate of $1.15 per year of the child's age.  As always, children 3 and under eat free.

Abinadi & Sidney

Compare these two firebrand preachers:

Yea, wo be unto this generation! And the Lord said unto me: Stretch forth thy hand and prophesy, saying: Thus saith the Lord, it shall come to pass that this generation, because of their iniquities, shall be brought into bondage, and shall be smitten on the cheek; yea, and shall be driven by men, and shall be slain; and the vultures of the air, and the dogs, yea, and the wild beasts, shall devour their flesh. And it shall come to pass that the life of king Noah shall be valued even as a garment in a hot furnace; for he shall know that I am the Lord. And it shall come to pass that I will smite this my people with sore afflictions, yea, with famine and with pestilence; and I will cause that they shall howl all the day long.

Yea, and I will cause that they shall have burdens lashed upon their backs; and they shall be driven before like a dumb ass. And it shall come to pass that I will send forth hail among them, and it shall smite them; and they shall also be smitten with the east wind; and insects shall pester their land also, and devour their grain. And they shall be smitten with a great pestilence—and all this will I do because of their iniquities and abominations.

And it shall come to pass that except they repent I will utterly destroy them from off the face of the earth; yet they shall leave a record behind them, and I will preserve them for other nations which shall possess the land; yea, even this will I do that I may discover the abominations of this people to other nations. And many things did Abinadi prophesy against this people.

One cause of our heavy persecutions, is the influence which those have in the world, whom we have separated from the fellowship of the church for their wickedness; who attempted to gratify their vengeance on us, and also to hide their own shame, by foul slanders and base calumny. We were at one time represented by them, as having all things common: at another as being enemies to the government: and in other places we were reported to be abolitionists, and indeed any thing, they thought best calculated to stir up the public mind, and to excite popular indignation; and if possible, put an end to the work, by sacrificing some of those who were considered as most active in supporting and defending the cause. But through the mercy of God, we are still in existence, and have the opportunity of joining with you in the privileges of this day.

Our cheeks have been given to the smiters, and our heads to those who have plucked off the hair. We have not only when smitten on one cheek turned the other, but we have done it, again and again, until we are wearied of being smitten, and tired of being trampled upon. We have proved the world with kindness; we have suffered their abuse without cause, with patience, and have endured without resentment, until this day, and still their persecutions and violence does not cease. But from this day and this hour, we will suffer it no more.

We take God and all the holy angels to witness this day, that we warn all men in the name of Jesus Christ, to come on us no more forever, for from this hour, we will bear it no more, our rights shall no more be trampled on with impunity. The man or the set of men, who attempts it, does it at the expense of their lives. And that mob that comes on us to disturb us; it shall be between us and them a war of extermination, for we will follow them, till the last drop of their blood is spilled, or else they will have to exterminate us: for we will carry the seal of war to their own houses, and their own families, and one party or the other shall be utterly destroyed.

On the left, we have Abinadi, and on the right we have Sidney Rigdon.  Both were preaching hellfire & damnation to a wicked generation.  Abinadi did so by God's request.  Sidney did so on his own errand.

Abinadi's words, while they got Abinadi burned, lit a fire in the heart of Alma and created a movement that swept the Nephite nation.  Sidney's words enflamed the hearts of the Missourians with anger to burn the homes of many saints.

While the duty is upon us to warn our neighbor, it is not our duty to poke the beast. Warn your neighbor one on one as the Spirit suggests.  If God asks us to publicly recite the abominations of LDSCorp, then, of course we should do so.  But your friends and family are less likely to listen to you after you get excommunicated. Provoking a billion dollar church with its own semi-secret police will likely turn out badly, nor will it bring Zion.  My uneducated opinion is that Zion gets established quietly, gathered by angels.  The LDSCorp should worry about John Dehlin more than it should worry about the remnant.

Be charitable and patient and labor to reach others. They will judge you harshly, but nevertheless be kind to them. They are going to grow to fear you, but that’s only part of how darkness responds to light. Give them no reason to fear you. The time will come for us to gather, but between now and then, be leaven. Preserve the world. Be salt. Preserve the world, even if it hates you.

Never go Full Abinadi (unless God asks you to).

Don't gladly anticipate the destruction of the wicked.  Make intercession for them.  Love your enemies, or you might share their fate.